My Inventions
尼古拉．特斯拉回憶錄（我的創作生涯）
By Nikola Tesla
At the age of 63 Tesla tells the story of his creative life.
尼古拉．特斯拉
在63歲那年述說他的創作生涯
First published in 1919 in the Electrical Experimenter magazine.
由 Electrical Experimenter 雜誌於 1919 年首次發行
Table of Contents
目 錄
I. My Early Life
第一章 我的早年生活
II. My First Efforts At Invention
第二章 我早期的發明嘗試
III. My Later Endeavors
第三章 我是如何構想旋轉磁場的
IV. The Discovery of the Tesla Coil and Transformer
第四章 發明特斯拉線圈和變壓器
V. The Magnifying Transmitter
第五章 放大發射機
VI. The Art of Telautomatics
第六章 自動遙控的藝術
I. My Early Life
第一章 我的早年生活
The progressive development of man is vitally dependent on invention. It is the most important product of his creative brain. Its ultimate purpose is the complete mastery of mind over the material world, the harnessing of the forces of nature to human needs. This is the difficult task of the inventor who is often misunderstood and unrewarded. But he finds ample compensation in the pleasing exercises of his powers and in the knowledge of being one of that exceptionally privileged class without whom the race would have long ago perished in the bitter struggle against pitiless elements.
人類的進步發展與創造發明息息相關，這是人類智慧最重要的產物。其最終目的是以智慧控制物質世界；利用自然界的力量來滿足人類的需求。對於那些經常遭受誤解，並得不到回報的發明家來說，這是一項艱巨的任務。然而，他們又得到了豐厚的精神補償，在利用智慧進行發明創造的過程中獲得了極大快樂，因為擁有知識而成為某些特權階層，沒有他們，面對殘酷的自然環境，人類早就滅亡了。
Speaking for myself, I have already had more than my full measure of this exquisite enjoyment, so much that for many years my life was little short of continuous rapture. I am credited with being one of the hardest workers and perhaps I am, if thought is the equivalent of labor, for I have devoted to it almost all of my waking hours. But if work is interpreted to be a definite performance in a specified time according to a rigid rule, then I may be the worst of idlers. Every effort under compulsion demands a sacrifice of life-energy. I never paid such a price. On the contrary, I have thrived on my thoughts.
多年來，我一直體驗著這種無上的快樂，一直沉浸在創造發明的持續滿足之中。人們稱讚我是最勤奮的人，如果思考也算勞動的話，或許的確如此，因為一天之中從睜開眼，我幾乎一直在思考。但是，如果工作被認為是在特定時間，根據狹隘標準從事某些特定活動的話，那麼或許我是最懶惰的傢伙。
每一項被迫進行的工作都會犧牲生命能量 。但是，這種現象從未在我身上出現過。反而，我越是思考，我的智慧就越豐富。
In attempting to give a connected and faithful account of my activities in this series of articles which will be presented with the assistance of the Editors of the ELECTRICAL EXPERIMENTER and are chiefly addrest to our young men readers, I must dwell, however reluctantly, on the impressions of my youth and the circumstances and events which have been instrumental in determining my career.
Our first endeavors are purely instinctive, promptings of an imagination vivid and undisciplined. As we grow older reason asserts itself and we become more and more systematic and designing. But those early impulses, tho not immediately productive, are of the greatest moment and may shape our very destinies. Indeed, I feel now that had I understood and cultivated instead of suppressing them, I would have added substantial value to my bequest to the world. But not until I had attained manhood did I realize that I was an inventor.
為了使這本傳記中記錄的人生經歷連貫且令人信服，儘管很不情願，我必須講述一下自己年輕時期所受的影響、所處的環境和經歷的事件，它們對我確立自己的職業生涯具有至關重要的作用。人們幼年時期的活動都是在純粹的本能驅使下進行的，充滿活力而又無拘無束。隨著年齡的增長，理性不斷得到強化，我們也會變得越來越有條理有計畫。那些早期的衝動，儘管沒有馬上產生成效，但卻是最偉大的，甚至可能決定我們的命運。事實上，我現在認為，假如我幼年時期充分理解並培養而並非壓制這些衝動，我將對世界做出更大的貢獻。但是，直到成年以後，我才真正意識到自己是一個發明家。
This was due to a number of causes. In the first place I had a brother who was gifted to an extraordinary degree—one of those rare phenomena of mentality which biological investigation has failed to explain. His premature death left my parents disconsolate. We owned a horse which had been presented to us by a dear friend. It was a magnificent animal of Arabian breed, possest of almost human intelligence, and was cared for and petted by the whole family, having on one occasion saved my father's life under remarkable circumstances.
這一過程之所以有些曲折，原因是多方面的。首先，我有一個才華橫溢的哥哥，他是罕見的天才，即使生物研究也很難解釋清楚。他的過早去世使我的人間父母終曰鬱鬱寡歡（關於 “ 人間父母 ” 的說法，我會在後面做出解釋）。我們家有匹馬，是好友送給我們的禮物。這是一匹高貴的阿拉伯純種馬，非常通人性，它曾在極其危險的情況下救了我父親的命，因此深得全家人的寵愛。
My father had been called one winter night to perform an urgent duty and while crossing the mountains, infested by wolves, the horse became frightened and ran away, throwing him violently to the ground. It arrived home bleeding and exhausted, but after the alarm was sounded immediately dashed off again, returning to the spot, and before the searching party were far on the way they were met by my father, who had recovered consciousness and remounted, not realizing that he had been lying in the snow for several hours. This horse was responsible for my brother's injuries from which he died. I witnest the tragic scene and altho fifty-six years have elapsed since, my visual impression of it has lost none of its force. The recollection of his attainments made every effort of mine seem dull in comparison. Anything I did that was creditable merely caused my parents to feel their loss more keenly. So I grew up with little confidence in myself.
一個寒冷的冬夜，我父親被人緊急叫去處理事情，途經常有狼群出沒的深山時，馬受了驚嚇，將父親重重地摔倒在地，狂奔而去。回到家時，它已是傷痕累累，筋疲力盡。但是，在向我們發出警報之後，它又馬上沖了出去，返回事發地點將已經恢復意識，卻不知自己已在雪地裡躺了幾個小時的父親馱了回來。返家途中，他們才碰上剛剛前來搜救的人群。
這匹馬在一次意外中弄傷了我的哥哥，並最終導致他的離世。我親眼目睹了那場慘劇，儘管事情已經過去了很多年，它在我腦海中留下的印象絲毫沒有減弱。在我的記憶中，哥哥實在太出色了，跟他相比，我所有的努力都顯得黯然失色。我做出任何值得稱道的事情，都只能加重他們對失去哥哥的痛苦。所以，我幼年時期是很缺乏自信的。
特斯拉小時候的全家福，你看得出哪個是他嗎？
But I was far from being considered a stupid boy, if I am to judge from an incident of which I have still a strong remembrance. One day the Aldermen were passing thru a street where I was at play with other boys. The oldest of these venerable gentlemen—a wealthy citizen—paused to give a silver piece to each of us.Coming to me he suddenly stopt and commanded, "Look in my eyes." I met his gaze, my hand outstretched to receive the much valued coin, when, to my dismay, he said, "No, not much, you can get nothing from me, you are too smart." They used to tell a funny story about me.I had two old aunts with wrinkled faces, one of them having two teeth protruding like the tusks of an elephant which she buried in my cheek every time she kist me.Nothing would scare me more than the prospect of being hugged by these as affectionate as unattractive relatives.It happened that while being carried in my mother's arms they asked me who was the prettier of the two.After examining their faces intently, I answered thoughtfully, pointing to one of them, "This here is not as ugly as the other."
但是，假如從一件我至今仍記憶猶新的事情來判斷的話，我絕對不是笨小孩。一天，我正和其他孩子在大街上玩耍，一群市政官走了過來。在這群受人尊敬的紳士當中，那位最年長的富人在我們面前停下來，送給每個小孩一枚銀幣。但是，當他走到我跟前時，突然命令道： “ 看著我的眼睛。 ” 我看著他的眼睛，伸出手去，準備接受那枚珍貴的硬幣。令我沮喪的是，他說： “ 不，沒有了，你從我這裡得不到任何東西。你太聰明了。 ”
人們總是喜歡談論我的一件趣事。我有兩位滿臉皺紋的姑姑，其中一位長著兩顆暴牙，活像象牙。每當她親吻我時，牙齒就會深深刺痛我的臉。沒有什麼能比這些充滿慈愛的 “ 醜 ” 親戚更讓我感到恐懼的了。一天，母親抱著我，她們問我哪位姑姑更漂亮。認真端詳她們的臉之後，我若有所思地指著其中一個說： “ 她沒有那個醜。 ”
Then again, I was intended from my very birth for the clerical profession and this thought constantly opprest me.I longed to be an engineer but my father was inflexible.He was the son of an officer who served in the army of the Great Napoleon and, in common with his brother, professor of mathematics in a prominent institution, had received a military education but, singularly enough, later embraced the clergy in which vocation he achieved eminence.He was a very erudite man, a veritable natural philosopher, poet and writer and his sermons were said to be as eloquent as those of Abraham a Sancta-Clara.He had a prodigious memory and frequently recited at length from works in several languages.He often remarked playfully that if some of the classics were lost he could restore them.His style of writing was much admired.He penned sentences short and terse and was full of wit and satire.The humorous remarks he made were always peculiar and characteristic.Just to illustrate, I may mention one or two instances.
此外，從出生那一刻起，家人就希望我將來能子承父業，做一名牧師，這個想法一直困擾著我。我只想做工程師，父親卻堅持己見，寸步不讓。我爺爺是拿破崙時期的一名軍官，他還有個兄弟是一所著名大學的數學教授，他們從小就接受了軍事教育。然而，令人不解的是，父親後來卻成了牧師，並獲得了相當高的名望。我父親非常博學，是一位名副其實的自然哲學家、詩人、作家。據說，他佈道時口才跟亞伯拉罕．阿．桑克塔．克拉拉（ Abraham a-Sancta-Clara ）一樣好。他有著驚人的記憶力，常常可以用幾種語言大段大段地背誦經典著作。他常常風趣地說，如果一些經典絕版，他完全可以依靠記憶把它們重新默寫出來。父親的寫作風格更是受到大家的讚譽。他筆下的句子簡潔明快，充滿著智慧和幽默。他寫出的內容總是詼諧幽默、見解獨到。簡單舉例說明的話，或許我可以講一兩個實例。
Among the help there was a cross-eyed man called Mane, employed to do work around the farm.He was chopping wood one day.As he swung the axe my father, who stood nearby and felt very uncomfortable, cautioned him, "For God's sake, Mane, do not strike at what you are looking but at what you intend to hit."
On another occasion he was taking out for a drive a friend who carelessly permitted his costly fur coat to rub on the carriage wheel.My father reminded him of it saying, "Pull in your coat, you are ruining my tire." He had the odd habit of talking to himself and would often carry on an animated conversation and indulge in heated argument, changing the tone of his voice.A casual listener might have sworn that several people were in the room.
在僕人當中，有一個眼睛斜視的人叫梅恩（ Mane ），他被雇來在農場一帶工作。一天，梅恩正在劈柴。正當他揮動斧頭的時候，站在旁邊的父親感到非常不安，於是警告說： “ 看在上帝的分上，梅恩，不要砍你看到的東西，要砍你想要擊中的東西。 ”
有一次，父親駕車出去兜風，一個朋友不小心將自己昂貴的皮大衣蹭到了車輪上。我父親提醒他說： “ 注意你的大衣，你會把我的車輪弄壞的。 ”
父親有一個自言自語的古怪習慣，他經常獨自一人變換著語調展開生動的談話，並縱情地激烈辯論。如果恰巧有人在附近聽到，肯定以為房間裡有幾個人正在起勁地辯論。
Altho I must trace to my mother's influence whatever inventiveness I possess, the training he gave me must have been helpful.It comprised all sorts of exercises—as, guessing one another's thoughts, discovering the defects of some form or expression, repeating long sentences or performing mental calculations.These daily lessons were intended to strengthen memory and reason and especially to develop the critical sense, and were undoubtedly very beneficial.
儘管追本溯源，我的創造能力與母親的影響息息相關，但父親對我的培養也是有一定益處的 。這些培養包括各種各樣的訓練，例如：推測他人的想法、發現某種表達方式的欠缺、背誦長句或練習心算。這些日常訓練是為了增強記憶力和推理能力，尤其是提高判斷力，毫無疑問，這些訓練對我日後的發展產生了巨大的積極作用。
My mother descended from one of the oldest families in the country and a line of inventors.Both her father and grandfather originated numerous implements for household, agricultural and other uses.She was a truly great woman, of rare skill, courage and fortitude, who had braved the storms of life and past thru many a trying experience.When she was sixteen a virulent pestilence swept the country.Her father was called away to administer the last sacraments to the dying and during his absence she went alone to the assistance of a neighboring family who were stricken by the dread disease.All of the members, five in number, succumbed in rapid succession.She bathed, clothed and laid out the bodies, decorating them with flowers according to the custom of the country and when her father returned he found everything ready for a Christian burial.
我的母親出生于農村的舊式家庭，有幾位家族成員是發明家。她的父親和祖父曾為家人發明了很多工具，用於家庭生活、農業生產或其他用途。母親是一位名副其實的偉大女性，她能力非凡，性格勇敢、剛毅，勇敢地面對生活中的風風雨雨，經歷過許多艱辛與苦難。在她 16 歲時，一場可怕的瘟疫席捲了整個地區。外祖父被人叫去給垂死的病人授臨終聖餐禮，他不在家時，母親獨自到已經染上重病、奄奄一息的鄰居家幫忙。她為已逝者沐浴、更衣並陳設屍體，並且按照當地的風俗用鮮花給他們做裝飾，等外祖父返回村莊的時候，他發現我母親已經為基督教葬禮做好了一切準備。
My mother was an inventor of the first order and would, I believe, have achieved great things had she not been so remote from modern life and its multifold opportunities.She invented and constructed all kinds of tools and devices and wove the finest designs from thread which was spun by her.She even planted the seeds, raised the plants and separated the fibers herself.She worked indefatigably, from break of day till late at night, and most of the wearing apparel and furnishings of the home was the product of her hands.When she was past sixty, her fingers were still nimble enough to tie three knots in an eyelash.
我母親是一流的發明家，我相信，如果她不是遠離現代生活，能接觸眾多機會的話，她一定能有很多偉大的發明 。她發明和製作了各種工具和設備，並用自己紡的棉線編織精美的圖案。她甚至親自播種、培育植物，然後親手提取纖維。她每天都會從黎明工作到深夜，忙個不停，家人的衣服和屋裡的傢俱陳設，大部分都出自母親的雙手。她年過 60 以後，手指仍然非常靈巧，甚至可以在一根眼睫毛上打三個結。
There was another and still more important reason for my late awakening.In my boyhood I suffered from a peculiar affliction due to the appearance of images, often accompanied by strong flashes of light, which marred the sight of real objects and interfered with my thought and action.They were pictures of things and scenes which I had really seen, never of those I imagined.When a word was spoken to me the image of the object it designated would present itself vividly to my vision and sometimes I was quite unable to distinguish whether what I saw was tangible or not.This caused me great discomfort and anxiety.None of the students of psychology or physiology whom I have consulted could ever explain satisfactorily these phenomena.They seem to have been unique altho I was probably predisposed as I know that my brother experienced a similar trouble.The theory I have formulated is that the images were the result of a reflex action from the brain on the retina under great excitation.They certainly were not hallucinations such as are produced in diseased and anguished minds, for in other respects I was normal and composed.To give an idea of my distress, suppose that I had witnest a funeral or some such nerve-racking spectacle.Then, inevitably, in the stillness of night, a vivid picture of the scene would thrust itself before my eyes and persist despite all my efforts to banish it.Sometimes it would even remain fixt in space tho I pushed my hand thru it.If my explanation is correct, it should be able to project on a screen the image of any object one conceives and make it visible.Such an advance would revolutionize all human relations.I am convinced that this wonder can and will be accomplished in time to come; I may add that I have devoted much thought to the solution of the problem.
我的遲遲覺醒，還有另外一個更為重要的原因。我少年時期，經常受到眼前一種奇特景象的折磨，它們的出現往往伴隨著強光，破壞我的視力，使我看不清真正的物體，並且干擾我的思想和行動 。那些呈現在我眼前的景象，根本不是自己的主觀臆想，都是我以前實際看到過的。當有人跟我說起一個詞的時候，那個詞特指的景象就會栩栩如生地浮現在我眼前，有時我根本無法判斷自己看到的事物是否真實存在。這讓我極為不適和驚恐不安。我請教過很多生理學和心理學方面的專業人士，卻沒有一個人可以圓滿地解釋這一奇特現象。這些現象似乎是獨一無二的，但我這種想法或許過於武斷，因為我知道哥哥以前也曾經遇到過同樣的問題。我自己得出的理論是這樣的：這些景象是高度興奮狀態下，大腦對視網膜產生的反射作用。它們絕對不是疾病或精神痛苦導致的幻覺，因為我在其他方面都很正常，情緒也很平靜。舉例來說，當我看到葬禮或其他刺激性場景時，我就會遭遇這種痛苦。一旦夜深人靜，那些景象便會紛至遝來，在我的眼前活靈活現，即使我想盡一切辦法仍不能將它們驅散。如果我的理論是正確的，那麼我們就有可能將人們想像的任何物體圖像投射到螢幕上，讓所有人看到。如果此預見成為現實，它將導致人與人關係的革命性變化。我堅信，這個奇跡可能而且必將在今後的某個時間實現。附帶說明一下，我已經對此問題進行了大量思考。我曾嘗試將自己腦海中浮現的圖像傳遞給身處其他房間的另外一個人的腦海之中。
To free myself of these tormenting appearances, I tried to concentrate my mind on something else I had seen, and in this way I would of ten obtain temporary relief; but in order to get it I had to conjure continuously new images.It was not long before I found that I had exhausted all of those at my command; my "reel" had run out, as it were, because I had seen little of the world—only objects in my home and the immediate surroundings.As I performed these mental operations for the second or third time, in order to chase the appearances from my vision, the remedy gradually lost all its force.Then I instinctively commenced to make excursions beyond the limits of the small world of which I had knowledge, and I saw new scenes.These were at first very blurred and indistinct, and would flit away when I tried to concentrate my attention upon them, but by and by I succeeded in fixing them; they gained in strength and distinctness and finally assumed the concreteness of real things.I soon discovered that my best comfort was attained if I simply went on in my vision farther and farther, getting new impressions all the time, and so I began to travel—of course, in my mind.Every night (and sometimes during the day), when alone, I would start on my journeys—see new places, cities and countries—live there, meet people and make friendships and acquaintances and, however unbelievable, it is a fact that they were just as dear to me as those in actual life and not a bit less intense in their manifestations.
為了從這些痛苦的景象中解脫出來，我強迫自己將注意力轉移到其他所看到過的東西上 。通常，利用這種方法，我可以暫時緩解痛苦；但是為了維持這種緩解狀態，我又不得不連續想像新的景象。沒過多久，我發現自己可以調用的記憶圖像已經枯竭， “ 影片盤 ” （ reel ）已經播完 ，因為我當時對世界的瞭解非常有限 —— 僅限於家中和有限範圍內的物品。當我在腦海中第二次或第三次 “ 開展 ” 這種腦力活動，追逐各種記憶景象時，緩解效力就會逐漸減弱，直至徹底消失。於是我便本能地開始遠足，突破自己已經瞭解的小世界，去發現新的景象。起初，這些新景象相當模糊，難於辨認；當我設法將注意力集中在這些景象上時，它們卻會倏忽而逝。不過，它們逐漸變強變清晰，最終呈現出真實物體的具體形象。我很快發現，如果我一直擴大自己想像的範圍，不斷獲得新的景象，就能最有效地緩解精神痛苦。於是，我開始旅遊，當然， 是在腦海中 。每天晚上（有時也會在白天），當獨處的時候，我便踏上旅途 —— 遊覽新地區、城市和國家；居住在那裡，瞭解當地的人，與他們結識並成為朋友 。事實上，無論多麼難以置信，他們對我很親近，就像現實生活中的人一樣相處，他們的表現同樣生動逼真，跟現實世界沒有絲毫差別。
This I did constantly until I was about seventeen when my thoughts turned seriously to invention.Then I observed to my delight that I could visualize with the greatest facility.I needed no models, drawings or experiments.I could picture them all as real in my mind.Thus I have been led unconsciously to evolve what I consider a new method of materializing inventive concepts and ideas, which is radically opposite to the purely experimental and is in my opinion ever so much more expeditious and efficient.The moment one constructs a device to carry into practise a crude idea he finds himself unavoidably engrost with the details and defects of the apparatus.As he goes on improving and reconstructing, his force of concentration diminishes and he loses sight of the great underlying principle.Results may be obtained but always at the sacrifice of quality.
就這樣我一直堅持到十七歲，此後便把全部精力放到了發明創造上 。此後，我驚喜地發現，我可以充分利用自己這種罕見的能力進行想像。我完全不需要任何模型、圖紙或者實驗，就可以在腦海中把所有細節完美地描繪出來。因此，我認為，自己在不知不覺中已經發展了一種嶄新的發明理念和思路，並與純粹的試驗理論形成鮮明的對比，而且在我看來，我的方法更快捷、更高效。當人們製造裝置去試驗某個粗略的想法時，總會發現自己不可避免地將注意力集中在裝置的細節上。在對裝置進行不斷改進和重新製造的過程中，他的注意力就會慢慢分散，並忽略設計的基本原理。或許，他們可以收穫一些成果，但是設計品質已經打了折扣。
My method is different.I do not rush into actual work.When I get an idea I start at once building it up in my imagination.I change the construction, make improvements and operate the device in my mind.It is absolutely immaterial to me whether I run my turbine in thought or test it in my shop.I even note if it is out of balance.There is no difference whatever, the results are the same.In this way I am able to rapidly develop and perfect a conception without touching anything.When I have gone so far as to embody in the invention every possible improvement I can think of and see no fault anywhere, I put into concrete form this final product of my brain.Invariably my device works as I conceived that it should, and the experiment comes out exactly as I planned it.In twenty years there has not been a single exception.Why should it be otherwise? Engineering, electrical and mechanical, is positive in results.There is scarcely a subject that cannot be mathematically treated and the effects calculated or the results determined beforehand from the available theoretical and practical data.The carrying out into practise of a crude idea as is being generally done is, I hold, nothing but a waste of energy, money and time.
我的設計方法則與此完全不同，我不會倉促進行實際工作 。當我有設計思路時，就會立刻用想像把它勾勒出來。我在腦海中修改框架，不斷完善，並進行試驗操作。不管在頭腦中運行自己的渦輪機，還是在工作室進行測試，對於我來說，完全都是想像行為。我甚至可以想像到渦輪機出現故障的細節。無論如何，我的想像和實際情況都沒有差別，想像和實際的結果是一樣的。利用這種設計方法，我不必接觸任何事物，就能快速實施和完善設想。當我將所能想到的所有合理改進都體現在設計中，直到再也找不出缺點時，我才會把腦海中的成品具體製作出來。無一例外，我設計的裝置實際運行情況與我的想像完全一致，試驗結果也正好符合我的設計計畫，二十年來無一例外。怎麼可能出現其他情況呢？工程、電氣和機械，所有結果都符合我的想像。從具有可行性的理論到實際資料，沒有什麼東西是不能在腦海中預先測試的。我認為，人們將一個初步想法付諸實踐的過程，完全是對精力、金錢和時間的浪費。
My early affliction had, however, another compensation.The incessant mental exertion developed my powers of observation and enabled me to discover a truth of great importance.I had noted that the appearance of images was always preceded by actual vision of scenes under peculiar and generally very exceptional conditions and I was impelled on each occasion to locate the original impulse.After a while this effort grew to be almost automatic and I gained great facility in connecting cause and effect.Soon I became aware, to my surprise, that every thought I conceived was suggested by an external impression.Not only this but all my actions were prompted in a similar way.In the course of time it became perfectly evident to me that I was merely an automaton endowed with power of movement, responding to the stimuli of the sense organs and thinking and acting accordingly.The practical result of this was the art of telautomatics which has been so far carried out only in an imperfect manner.Its latent possibilities will, however, be eventually shown.I have been since years planning self-controlled automata and believe that mechanisms can be produced which will act as if possest of reason, to a limited degree, and will create a revolution in many commercial and industrial departments.
然而，我還從早期的痛苦中得到了另外一種補償。持續不斷的腦力活動培養了我的觀察能力，使我發現了一個非常重要的事實。我注意到，我頭腦中出現的圖像都是對以前在一些異常或者極特殊的條件下發生的實際景象的反映，而且每次我都會強迫自己確定這些圖像的原始推動力。不久，這種努力幾乎變成了自動行為，而且我可以很熟練地將事情的因果聯繫起來。我很快意識到，讓我驚訝的是，我的每個想法源於外界某種事物的啟示。不僅如此，我所有的行為也都是同樣的原因所致。隨著時間的推移，我越來越清楚地意識到，我僅僅是一台自動裝置 —— 感官刺激賦予我力量，然後做出相應的思考和行動 。這一發現的實際價值，就是促使我提出了 “ 遙控自動學 ” 這一概念 。不過，到目前為止，這種技術還不是特別完善。無論如何，人們終將認識它的巨大發展潛力。多年來，我一直在設計 “ 自動控制機 ” （ automata ） 。我相信，必然可以製造出具有一定智慧功能的機械裝置，並在商業和工業的諸多領域引發一場革命。
I was about twelve years old when I first succeeded in banishing an image from my vision by wilful effort, but I never had any control over the flashes of light to which I have referred.They were, perhaps, my strangest experience and inexplicable.They usually occurred when I found myself in a dangerous or distressing situation, or when I was greatly exhilarated.In some instances I have seen all the air around me filled with tongues of living flame.Their intensity, instead of diminishing, increased with time and seemingly attained a maximum when I was about twenty-five years old.While in Paris, in 1883, a prominent French manufacturer sent me an invitation to a shooting expedition which I accepted.I had been long confined to the factory and the fresh air had a wonderfully invigorating effect on me.On my return to the city that night I felt a positive sensation that my brain had caught fire.I saw a light as tho a small sun was located in it and I past the whole night applying cold compressions to my tortured head.Finally the flashes diminished in frequency and force but it took more than three weeks before they wholly subsided.When a second invitation was extended to me my answer was an emphatic NO!
大約在12歲時，我第一次憑藉主觀意志成功地將一幅圖像從我的頭腦中驅逐出去。但是，對於前面提到的閃光現象，我一直無法控制。或許，這是我一生中最為奇特和神秘的體驗。通常，當我身陷危險或痛苦的境地，或者情緒極度興奮時，閃光就會不期而遇。我曾在某些情況下看到周圍的空氣中充滿了熊熊燃燒的火焰。隨著時間的推移，我所看到的閃光強度沒有減弱反而變強，在我25歲左右時，達到了極限。
1883 年，我在法國停留期間，一位著名的法國製造商邀請我去狩獵，我應允了。因為曾長期局限於工廠生活，郊外的新鮮空氣使我神清氣爽、精神百倍。當天晚上，在回城的路上，我明顯感覺到腦袋在著火，仿佛有個小太陽在裡面燃燒。整個晚上，我都在冷敷自己那顆備受折磨的腦袋。最後，閃光出現的頻率降低，強度減弱，但卻用了三個多星期的時間才完全平息。當第二次有人邀請我去狩獵的時候，我堅決回答道： “ 不！ ”
These luminous phenomena still manifest themselves from time to time, as when a new idea opening up possibilities strikes me, but they are no longer exciting, being of relatively small intensity.When I close my eyes I invariably observe first, a background of very dark and uniform blue, not unlike the sky on a clear but starless night.In a few seconds this field becomes animated with innumerable scintillating flakes of green, arranged in several layers and advancing towards me.Then there appears, to the right, a beautiful pattern of two systems of parallel and closely spaced lines, at right angles to one another, in all sorts of colors with yellow-green and gold predominating.Immediately thereafter the lines grow brighter and the whole is thickly sprinkled with dots of twinkling light.This picture moves slowly across the field of vision and in about ten seconds vanishes to the left, leaving behind a ground of rather unpleasant and inert grey which quickly gives way to a billowy sea of clouds, seemingly trying to mould themselves in living shapes.It is curious that I cannot project a form into this grey until the second phase is reached.Every time, before falling asleep, images of persons or objects flit before my view.When I see them I know that I am about to lose consciousness.If they are absent and refuse to come it means a sleepless night.
每當我的腦海出現新思路時，便不斷出現發光的現象，但強度逐漸減弱，也不再令人興奮了。當我閉上雙眼的時侯，首先總是能看到一片深邃而均勻的藍色背景，活像淸澈的、沒有星光的夜空。幾秒鐘之後，這片藍色的背景變得靈動起來，無數閃爍著光芒的綠色火花，一層層地向我飄來。接著，在背景右側出現了兩種美麗的圖案，上面平行排列著間隔緊密的線條。兩種圖形構成直角，顏色以黃色、綠色和金色為主。隨後，所有的線條變得更加明亮，整個背景佈滿了密密麻麻的閃爍亮點。這幅景象在我的視野中緩慢地穿行，大約十秒之後，消失在左側。之後，我的眼前是一片沉悶的、令人厭惡的灰色背景，直到第二個片段再次出現。每當入睡之前，人和物體的影像就會在我眼前掠過 。看到這些影像時，我就知道自己快要人睡了。如果這些影像遲遲不出現，就意味著我將度過一個不眠之夜。關於想像對我早年生活的影響程度，我想用另外一些奇特的經歷進一步說明。
To what an extent imagination played a part in my early life I may illustrate by another odd experience.Like most children I was fond of jumping and developed an intense desire to support myself in the air.Occasionally a strong wind richly charged with oxygen blew from the mountains rendering my body as light as cork and then I would leap and float in space for a long time.It was a delightful sensation and my disappointment was keen when later I undeceived myself.
During that period I contracted many strange likes, dislikes and habits, some of which I can trace to external impressions while others are unaccountable.I had a violent aversion against the earrings of women but other ornaments, as bracelets, pleased me more or less according to design.The sight of a pearl would almost give me a fit but I was fascinated with the glitter of crystals or objects with sharp edges and plane surfaces.I would not touch the hair of other people except, perhaps, at the point of a revolver.I would get a fever by looking at a peach and if a piece of camphor was anywhere in the house it caused me the keenest discomfort.Even now I am not insensible to some of these upsetting impulses.When I drop little squares of paper in a dish filled with liquid, I always sense a peculiar and awful taste in my mouth.I counted the steps in my walks and calculated the cubical contents of soup plates, coffee cups and pieces of food—otherwise my meal was unenjoyable.All repeated acts or operations I performed had to be divisible by three and if I mist I felt impelled to do it all over again, even if it took hours.
跟大多數孩子一樣，我喜歡跳躍，並希望空氣中有神奇的力量把我托起來。有時候，山裡吹來一陣充滿氧氣的強風，我的身體就像軟木一樣輕飄飄的，接著我會跳起來，在空中漂浮好長時間，這真是一種奇妙的感受。後來我才明白，這完全是主觀欺騙，因此而感到極其失望。
在童年時期，我形成了很多奇怪的好惡感和習慣，有些可以歸於外界印象的影響，有些則是無法解釋的。我極其反感女人佩戴耳環，而其他飾品 —— 例如手鐲 —— 則讓我感到愉悅，不過喜愛程度決定於設計及圖案。看到珍珠我會感到眩暈，但閃閃發光的水晶或帶有銳角和平面的物體卻讓我神魂顛倒。除非被手槍逼著，我絕對不會觸摸別人的頭髮；我看到桃子就會發高燒；無論在屋子的什麼地方，只要一小片樟腦就能令我坐臥不寧。即使現在，我對這些東西仍然很敏感，仍然會感到心煩意亂。如果把碎紙片放到盛滿液體的碟子中，我就會感到嘴巴裡有一種怪異的、噁心的味道。我走路時喜歡數著腳步；吃飯時喜歡計算湯盆和咖啡杯的體積，以及食物的份數，否則一頓飯就會吃得索然無味。所有我重複過的動作或做過的事情，其次數都必須能被3整除，如果不是這樣，即便花上幾個小時，我也要強迫自己重新做一遍 。
Up to the age of eight years, my character was weak and vacillating.I had neither courage or strength to form a firm resolve.My feelings came in waves and surges and vibrated unceasingly between extremes.My wishes were of consuming force and like the heads of the hydra, they multiplied.I was opprest by thoughts of pain in life and death and religious fear.I was swayed by superstitious belief and lived in constant dread of the spirit of evil, of ghosts and ogres and other unholy monsters of the dark.Then, all at once, there came a tremendous change which altered the course of my whole existence.
八歲之前，我一直是個脆弱的、優柔寡斷的孩子。我既沒有勇氣也沒有力量去塑造堅定的決斷力。我的情緒波浪般運動，並且毫不停歇地在兩個極端間變化。我的願望耗費了我很多的精力，而且像九頭蛇的頭那樣，越來越多（譯者：九頭蛇有九個頭，打掉一個，會生出兩個新的）。我懼怕生死，敬畏神靈，無法承受生命中的苦痛。我迷信，終日膽戰心驚，生怕遇到什麼妖魔鬼怪，以及任何生活在黑暗之中的邪惡猛獸。後來，我的性格突然發生了巨大變化，以至於我的整個人生道路都改變了。
Of all things I liked books the best.My father had a large library and whenever I could manage I tried to satisfy my passion for reading.He did not permit it and would fly into a rage when he caught me in the act.He hid the candles when he found that I was reading in secret.He did not want me to spoil my eyes.But I obtained tallow, made the wicking and cast the sticks into tin forms, and every night I would bush the keyhole and the cracks and read, often till dawn, when all others slept and my mother started on her arduous daily task.
在所有東西中，我最喜歡的是書籍 。父親有一個很大的藏書室，我總是想方設法滿足自己的閱讀欲望。但是，父親不允許我閱讀，一經發現，他就會勃然大怒。當他發現我偷偷看書時，藏了我的蠟燭。他擔心讀書會傷害眼睛。但是我找到牛油做燈芯，然後把它們黏合好放到一個錫器中，每天晚上我都會用東西遮住書房的門縫和鎖眼，開始讀書，往往是讀到破曉時分 。此時，所有人都還在沉睡，只有母親起床開始她一天的辛勤勞作。
On one occasion I came across a novel entitled "Abafi" (the Son of Aba), a Serbian translation of a well known Hungarian writer, Josika.This work somehow awakened my dormant powers of will and I began to practise self-control.At first my resolutions faded like snow in April, but in a little while I conquered my weakness and felt a pleasure I never knew before—that of doing as I willed.In the course of time this vigorous mental exercise became second nature.At the outset my wishes had to be subdued but gradually desire and will grew to be identical.After years of such discipline I gained so complete a mastery over myself that I toyed with passions which have meant destruction to some of the strongest men.At a certain age I contracted a mania for gambling which greatly worried my parents.To sit down to a game of cards was for me the quintessence of pleasure.My father led an exemplary life and could not excuse the senseless waste of time and money in which I indulged.I had a strong resolve but my philosophy was bad.I would say to him, "I can stop whenever I please but is it worth while to give up that which I would purchase with the joys of Paradise?" On frequent occasions he gave vent to his anger and contempt but my mother was different.She understood the character of men and knew that one's salvation could only be brought about thru his own efforts.One afternoon, I remember, when I had lost all my money and was craving for a game, she came to me with a roll of bills and said, "Go and enjoy yourself.The sooner you lose all we possess the better it will be.I know that you will get over it." She was right.I conquered my passion then and there and only regretted that it had not been a hundred times as strong.I not only vanquished but tore it from my heart so as not to leave even a trace of desire.Ever since that time I have been as indifferent to any form of gambling as to picking teeth.
有一次，我找到了一本名為《阿巴菲》（Abafi，意為 Aba 的兒子）的小說，是匈牙利著名作家 Josika （約西卡）作品的塞爾維亞語譯本。不知何故，這本小說喚醒了我沉睡的意志力，我開始練習控制自我意識。起初，我的決心就像四月的雪那樣很快消失了，但不久，我克服了缺點，並感到了前所未有的快樂 —— 我可以按照自己的意志做事情了。
隨著時間的流逝，這種積極的心理練習成了我的第二天性。剛開始，我的願望常常受到壓制。但是，慢慢地，願望和意志統一起來。經過幾年的訓練，我完全控制了自己的意志，甚至開始以遊戲心態控制自己的愛好，一些足以毀滅意志最堅強之人的愛好。在某個階段，我染上了賭癮，使得父母終日憂心忡忡。對我來說，坐下來打牌是最大的樂事。父親過著一種堪稱世人典範的生活，他絕對不允許我渾渾噩噩地浪費時間和金錢。當時，我意志非常堅定，卻沒有健康的人生哲學。我總是對父親說： “ 只要我願意，我隨時都可以洗手不幹，但是放棄那種在天堂才可以買到的快樂，值得嗎？ ” 父親會時不時地沖我發洩他心中的憤怒和不滿，但母親卻不同。她瞭解男人的特點，知道要想解救一個人，必須要通過他自身的努力。我記得有一天下午，當我輸光了所有的錢，渴望再大賭一場的時候，母親帶著一綑錢走到我面前說： “ 去痛痛快快享受吧，你越早把錢輸個精光越好，我知道你會幡然悔悟的。 ” 她是對的，我當時就控制了自己的欲望。我唯一感到後悔的是，如果那種欲望再強烈一百倍就更好了，那樣更能體現我意志的強大。我不但戰勝了賭癮，而且把它在心中撕得粉碎，不留絲毫念頭。自從那次起，就像對剔牙一樣，我對任何形式的賭博都不感興趣了。
During another period I smoked excessively, threatening to ruin my health.Then my will asserted itself and I not only stopt but destroyed all inclination.Long ago I suffered from heart trouble until I discovered that it was due to the innocent cup of coffee I consumed every morning.I discontinued at once, tho I confess it was not an easy task.In this way I checked and bridled other habits and passions and have not only preserved my life but derived an immense amount of satisfaction from what most men would consider privation and sacrifice.
在另外一個階段，我又吸煙無度，最終危害到了健康 。接著我的意志力又發揮了作用，不僅戒了煙，而且戒掉了所有不良嗜好。很久以前，我患上了心臟病，直到後來才發現，是每天早晨喝咖啡的習慣引起的。於是，我立即把它戒了，儘管我承認那並不是一件容易做到的事情。就這樣，我克服和抑制了其他陋習和欲望，不僅保活了生命，而且獲得了極大的滿足感，儘管大多數人認為我的這種生活方式有點兒苦行僧的味道，喪失了很多人生樂趣。
After finishing the studies at the Polytechnic Institute and University I had a complete nervous breakdown and while the malady lasted I observed many phenomena strange and unbelievable.
結束了格拉茲理工學院和布拉格大學的課程之後，我的精神曾一度陷入了崩潰境地。患病期間，我觀察到了很多奇異的、令人難以置信的現象 ……
（第一章結束 全文待續）
原文資料來源： http://www.institutotesla.org/NikolaTesla-MyInventions.html
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